by backtobasicsmanners | Oct 28, 2012 | Uncategorized
by Kimberly Irwin
When you watch a movie or read a book which are the parts you remember the most distinctly? The beginning and the end ofcourse! That’s why first impressions are crucial when forming new relationships and leave a lasting impression. Whether you are meeting a new potential employer, new friend or love interest, the principles remain the same. Here are some general guidelines to helping you achieve the best possible first impression every time. Here are some key tips to make a great first impression!
1. Be confident: confidence is always key. If you’re not proud of who you are, why would anyone want to be around you?
2. Be a good listener: avoid dominating too much of the conversation. Allow other people to speak and ask for their opinions. Others will appreciate that you took the time to listen to what they have to say.
3. Make eye contact: eye contact shows that you’re engaged in the conversation and are an active participant in it.
4. Dress well: grooming. If you look nice, people will generally have a more positive impression of you. Meet with a stylist to create the perfect “look” that represents your signature style!
5. Be honest: People can tell when you are being sincere and genuine.
6. Be respectful: Always be respectful. There is nothing more off putting than a rude person.
7. Use the other person’s name: People love to hear their own names. It makes others feel special and valued.
8. Be humble: Humility is a highly admired quality in a person. Avoid bragging about yourself or constantly trying to be the center of attention.
9. Be at eye level with the person you are speaking to. If they are standing, you should stand and vice versa.
10. Always rise when being introduced to someone new especially someone older or higher rank.
11. Hygiene: make sure your nails, hair, hands, face, ears and teeth are clean and presentable and your clothes are fresh and laundered. Deodorant is a MUST.
12. Open up a conversation with a compliment: not only is it the perfect icebreaker but making someone feel good with a compliment is one of the kindest gestures and can make someone’s entire day! Often, people feel ignored or anonymous and you have the power to make them feel special and noticed!
13. Offer to help someone: another great ice breaker and a foot into the door of someone’s heart is to take the time to volunteer your assistance or loan someone something that they need. This is especially shocking as a stranger will be tremendously grateful and pleasantly surprised that you were so generous and helpful. The gesture says a lot about you and it also inspires others to pay it forward and be kind to others.
14. Listen: sometimes just lending a caring ear and empathizing with someone is just what the doctor ordered. Sometimes your calm presence and focused attention can even be powerful enough to save a life.
15. Make something home made instead of store bought or host someone in your home instead of meeting at a restaurant: time is money and this gesture demonstrates that the person’s company is valuable enough to you to invest the time. Priceless!
16. Table manners: if you are making your dining companion nauseous by licking your fingers, picking up crumbs and eating them, chewing with your mouth open, talking with your mouth full, slurping your drink, hitting your utensils against your teeth, leaning on the table or holding your drink with both hands they will not be able to even look at you let alone connect with you.
Keep these tips in mind to get started off on the right foot in personal and professional interactions. And remember, you only have one chance to make a great first impression!
by backtobasicsmanners | Aug 26, 2011 | Uncategorized
by Deborah Block, Director, Back to Basics
And with good reason.
For children who have not learned how to partner dance - a school prom can be a daunting challenge...Since they don't know how to lead and follow and have no concept of personal space they tend to adopt what they see in popular media - the freak and grind. Some use the excuse that it is simply a form of self expression or cultural norms but that is just an excuse since they actually know no other alternative. As a result schools across the country are taking matters into their own hands. Some are empowering students with actual skills while others are trying to curb inappropriate conduct with rules and contracts. Either way, it is making headlines. Many cultures around the world use solo and partner dancing to highlight rights of passage, rituals and even casual celebrations but for those who aren't exposed to it growing up, it can be too hot to handle when they are thrown into the fire! Here are some examples of what parents, administrators and chaperones are doing to prevent that "spark" from turning into a wild fire:
- In order to attend a dance at Walnut Hills High School in Evanston, students must sign pledges that they will not dress
provocatively or engage in lewd dancing. Their parents must sign, too. “Grinding, bumping, fondling, humping, licking, booty dancing, rolling, kicking, mashing, shoving, wallowing, disrobing, sexual kissing, freaking, jacking, and whatever a chaperone deems improper and/or indecent will not be permitted.” Students who break the rules will be removed from the dance and assigned Friday School detention for the remainder of the year.
• In Guam high schools, National Honor Society members have been threatened with a suspension for dancing in an inappropriate manner.
• At Dunwoody High School in the Atlanta area, students were told that if they were caught “dirty dancing” those who violated the policy would be sent to a “timeout” room if caught.
• Gabriel Richard High School in Riverview, Mich., linked dance attendance to passing a quiz about dance floor behavior.
• A Brown Deer, Wis., high school has thrown students out of dances, sent letters home to parents and threatened to suspend youths caught dirty dancing.
• Lower Merion High School in Philadelphia canceled school dances beginning next fall until students can propose rules.
• Dances have been canceled at schools nationwide, including in suburban Los Angeles; Iowa City, Iowa; Anchorage, Alaska; and Bethany, Ky.
• Administrators at Union Grove High School in Wisconsin are aiming to curb risque moves at their January winter formal. To assure that students do not get too footloose, school brass have issued official dance rules. As seen below, the rules outlaw "sexual bending" and the touching of breasts, buttocks, or genitals. Leg straddling is also verboten. Additionally, students are on notice that "Both feet must remain on the dance floor at all times." The dance "will be videotaped to insure the safety of all students attending," and so administrators could presumably review the film for provocative moves that were initially missed by monitors.
reprinted in part from The Cincinnati Enquirer
by backtobasicsmanners | Aug 26, 2011 | Uncategorized
External circle of influences reinforce lessons learned at home. Children benefit from a social skills program because of the positive reinforcement they receive through “positive peer pressure” as they see the relevance of these concepts in their daily interactions with others outside of their usual comfort zone. In our program, Back to Basics, our students develop or fine tune their communication skills through life skills, manners and social dancing. The importance of good manners is obvious but what may be less obvious is how powerful social dancing skills are for celebrating milestones, personal expression and defining boundaries.
As witnessed in the documentary film “Mad Hot Ballroom” and movies like “Take the Lead”, social dance helps children cultivate coordination, self-esteem, respect, and socialization skills. Social dancing empowers children to:
• experience the joys of social dance fundamentals, music and rhythm.
• create opportunities for self expression.
• enjoy the social dance skills necessary for proms, parties, weddings and cotillions.
• inspire others to seek out dancing throughout their lives.
• to step out and shine when they may be shy or introverted.
• release pent up physical energies
• enhance their self-esteem by learning a new skill and achieving a goal.
• improve participation and confidence using interactive social skills.
• engage in teamwork with others
• learn dance floor etiquette and appropriate decorum.
• broaden their exposure to the world of music and culture.
• gain an appreciation for dance performances as an artistic form of entertainment and expression.
• become acclimatized to public presentation.
• experience appropriate touching by defining their own boundaries and respecting the personal space of others.
• improve their physical health and combat obesity by making exercise fun!
